Seafarer’s wife: IS IT worthy to fall in love with a seafarer? How will the love survive when you are oceans apart?

Llavor-Deita: Seafarer’s wife
JAN DOLLY GRACE LLAVOR-DEITA
April 23, 2019 https://www.sunstar.com.ph/article/1802549

IS IT worthy to fall in love with a seafarer? How will the love survive when you are oceans apart? Who will take care of you? When will he be back? When will he join you? Is he online now? Can I trust him? Is he faithful? Questions and more questions will never end when you love a person who is nautical miles away from you. No matter how long you have been together as husband and wife, still questions will continue to ponder your thoughts and will challenge to awaken your senses.

Being a seafarer’s wife is no joke. The journeys of being married to a seafarer are not always smooth sailing. Rough seas, tidal waves, tsunamis will be experienced figuratively; but, what makes it unique is the peaceful seas ahead in your married life after the storm. Married to a seafarer is not easy; it is the same with other couples who are together all the time. After all marriage is not always a bed of roses.

However, the success of the marriage is not one sided only, always remember that it takes two to tango. Others may say that jammy for you that you married a seaman, some would say lucky for the seafarers, they married a lady but I would rather say that being bonded in your marriage is fortunate because it is blessed by God.

You have to face the fact that most of the time, a seafarer’s wife can only spend an average of three to four months with her husband in a year and it is sad to note that the husband’s stay with his wife and children will only be called vacation. Nevertheless, once your husband is with you, make the most of it by spending quality time with him. I should know because I am married to one. I have been married to a seafarer for 18 years but I still consider my journey with him as an educative lifelong challenge. Doing my job as a professor and at the same time taking care with my children is not an easy undertaking, reminding my husband about important events is quite tasking and pulling my husband off the couch for a date night is trying. But don’t get me wrong, these experiences had molded me to what I am today and the support given by my husband was really an added bonus. Plus, I got to learn words that are used on board such as moored, berth, anchored, port, starboard, keel, hull, and mess man. I even discovered that the crew’s favorite person is what they popularly call in their lingo as “mayor” or officially known as chief cook. It is after all the “mayor” who is the one taking care of their stomachs. In addition, I had even learned that term Bridge is entirely different from the word bridge that I know. Moreover, I had the opportunity of spending time with my husband on board his vessel. I saw that his job was not easy because safety of the crew is at stake there.

Yes, being a seafarer’s wife takes a lot of prayer, hard work, dedication, loyalty, fidelity and trust. Lastly, Seafarer’s wife needs to be strong in order to face the test of time and distance.